Being A Good Mother
In
this ever increasing age of ungodly TV programs and secular humanist
education, what is a Christian parent to do?
Kids hear the gospel of evolution from the classrooms every day and from the
TV shows almost all the time. The ways of the world are being instilled in
your child, whether you like it or not. There are many do's for the
Christian parent to follow. The best parenting manual is the book of
Proverbs. This is the best parenting manual you will ever read.
The following are basic principles taken from the Book of Proverbs and
should be followed to insure your home is managed in the proper way:
Proverbs 6:20 "My son, keep thy father's commandment, and forsake not the
law of thy mother:"
Live a life that is pleasing to the Lord. Love the Lord. Your love for Jesus
will put a desire in your child to do the same. Set a good example.
Proverbs 23:26 "My son, give me thine heart, and let thine eyes observe my
ways."
Children learn behavior from their parents. Children watch their parents.
Children repeat what their parents say and do. Children learn how to
socialize by engaging in conversations within the family unit.
Tell them about Jesus. Show them the love of Jesus. Teach them to pray to
their Heavenly Father in the mighty name of Jesus.
Teach them about sin and how it displeases the Lord. Tell them about God's
forgiveness. Tell them your testimony and how Jesus saved you from your
sins. Tell them about what God has done for you. Tell them how Jesus loves
them so very much and how He died for them and rose again.
Plant Bible verses within their hearts every day of their life without
making it pushy. Add a verse within conversations. When they complain about
a bully at school, you can, within the conversation, quote them the verse
that applies to the situation. Teach them about God's forgiveness.
2Tim 3:15 "And that from a child thou hast known the holy scriptures, which
are able to make thee wise unto salvation through faith which is in Christ
Jesus."
Instill Biblical values. Children are constantly hearing the world's point
of view. They must be taught God's point of view. They must feel the love of
Jesus from you. Live the life...don't be a hypocrite.
Pray with them. Pray for their friends and teachers. Pray for the bullies at
school.
Teach your children how to effectively pray and when to pray. My mother
would tell me; "Pray before you leave the school bus and also before your
test. The Lord will help you, sweetheart. The Lord loves you so very much.
I will be praying for you today." Children need to be taught the Word of
God. If they don't learn Biblical principles from you, they will learn the
worldly principles from someone else.
Shut the TV off and do Bible studies together.
Titus 2:12 "Teaching us that, denying ungodliness and worldly lusts, we
should live soberly, righteously, and godly, in this present world;"
Eph 5:11 "And have no fellowship with the unfruitful works of darkness, but
rather reprove them."
When you are displeased with a certain program on TV, explain why the
program is wrong. Teach your child to cling to the good and abhor the bad.
Teach them the things that displease the Lord and why they should want to do
things pleasing in God's sight.
Discuss at dinner how their day went at school. Listen to their stories.
Notice them. Acknowledge them. Be attentive to their problems and struggles.
If they are pulling away from you and are quiet about their problems, seek
them out. Children desire attention and want to feel that they are
appreciated and loved. They want to be noticed.
Look in their eyes when you talk with them. Listen to them. Be a good
listener. Forget your worries for the moment and concentrate only on them.
Notice when they're acting differently.
Laugh at their jokes. Relate to them. If you cannot relate to them, ask the
Lord to teach you how to relate to them so that you can be "cool" in their
book.
Respect them and treasure them. They are your gift from the Lord. They are
little people with feelings and dreams.
Use your ears more than your mouth. Let them tell you how they feel.
Be flexible when needed.
Be excited when you see them. Get off the phone when your children come home
from school. Talk to them instead of your girlfriends when they get home.
This gives them assurance that you value them and want to spend time with
them. Give them your undivided attention. Be understanding when they have a
difficult day. Make suggestions that might better improve their situation.
Suggest prayer and pray with them that God will help them to be the best
person they can be. Always include yourself in the prayer.
Thank them. Point out what you like about them. Encourage them. Tell them
how special they are in God's eyes.
Tell them how pleased you are of them. Tell them how much you like being
with them.
Let them make mistakes. Help them to learn from those mistakes. Ask them
what they have learned. Invest your time in them.
Be attentive to them when they're sick. Pamper them. Let them know that they
are loved. Tell them that God loves them so very much and they are so
special in God's eyes.
Proverbs 13:1 "A wise son heareth his father's instruction: but a scorner
heareth not rebuke."
When they seek your counsel, set the example and pray with them that the
Lord will show you what to do. A child who sees his parent reliant upon God
will also follow in the same footsteps.
Proverbs 4:1 "Hear, ye children, the instruction of a father, and attend to
know understanding."
Proverbs 19:18 "Chasten thy son while there is hope, and let not thy soul
spare for his crying."
Proverbs 22:15 "Foolishness is bound in the heart of a child; but the rod
of correction shall drive it far from him."
When they are misbehaving, they must be corrected and/or disciplined.
Correction, discipline and understanding go together. You cannot correct a
child without explaining, in love, why they are receiving correction and/or
discipline. The sarcastic phrase, "because I said so" is not the way to
correct your child. It is the phrase of the world but should not be the
phrase in the Christian home. Children question such phrases and they do not
understand why what they did was wrong. Suggest better behaviors when they
act out. Explain why it is displeasing to you so they may better understand
why they are being corrected.
Proverbs 29:17 "Correct thy son, and he shall give thee rest; yea, he shall
give delight unto thy soul."
Deal with problems and conflicts while they are still small. Do not reward a
child who is throwing a temper tantrum. If they are screaming and crying,
they have to know that this sort of behavior will not be tolerated nor
rewarded. They need to know that this sort of behavior displeases you and it
displeases God.
Everyday is a training session. Everyday, you give them something they will
use for the rest of their lives.
Psalm 103:13 "Like as a father pitieth his children, so the LORD pitieth
them that fear him."
In order to teach them humility, you must show by example. Admit when you
make a mistake. Tell them how you should have done things better or explain
why it was a mistake. The more you talk to your child about these things,
the less they will want to repeat your mistake. They will learn right along
with you.
Teach them responsibility. Give them tasks or chores to do around the house.
Teach them accountability. They must stand accountable for their own
actions.
Include them in decision-making. Ask their opinions. Welcome their
suggestions. If you are buying a house, take them along. Include them in the
process so that they will better understand how things work in the real
world.
Pray with them before dropping them off at school events. Pray that the Lord
will help them to do their very best. Show up at their concerts, games and
events. Don't criticize them if they miss the basket or if they strike out.
Praise them when they do well. Encourage them in all that they do. Expect
their best; don't expect perfection. Support them. Compliment them. Give God
the glory for the things that they do. Teach them according to Philippians
4:13.
Tell them what you expect of them.
Proverbs 17:6 "Children's children are the crown of old men; and the glory
of children are their fathers."
Always be truthful and sincere. Integrity is taught to your children by you
walking in integrity, as the example.
Proverbs 20:7 "The just man walketh in his integrity: his children are
blessed after him."
Be a person of your word. Keep the promises you make.
Know their interests. Take an interest in the things they find important.
Clip magazine pictures or articles that interest them. Share their
excitement. Contribute to their collections and hobbies. Join in their
adventures. Meet their friends. Meet their friend's parents.
Nurture them with good food, good words and good fun. Tell them that they
are the wonderful treasure that God has blessed you with. Make time to be
with them.
Notice when they grow. Help them mature into fine adults by giving them good
biblical instruction. You can better prepare them for life by teaching them
godly principles and the more comfortable they will be out in the real
world.
Titus 2:4 "That they may teach the young women to be sober, to love their
husbands, to love their children,"
When you drop them off at their friend's house to play, wave and honk when
you drive by them as you leave. Smile and laugh with them.
Teach them manners. Tell them why manners are important. Include them in
conversations. This is very important because children develop their social
skills by interacting at home.
Instill truth in them. Believe what they say. Be rational. NEVER YELL AT
THEM FOR TELLING YOU THE TRUTH. Be understanding. You have to remember,
they are being very brave in telling you the awful truth and keep this in
mind. Do not discourage them from telling you the truth in the future by
yelling and screaming at them. If you do this, they will begin to lie to you
to avoid punishment. Instead, pray for understanding. Tell them that you
appreciate them fessing up and admitting the truth. Tell them that you are
displeased with what they have done but are very pleased in the fact that
they told you the truth. Many good parents have said, "If you come to me
with the truth, you will not be punished. But if you lie and when I find out
about it later, you will be punished. It is better to tell the truth from
the very beginning."
Make sure you let them know that your love for them is unconditional. This
they will feel from you by your words but especially by your actions. Love
them no matter what.
1John 3:18 "My little children, let us not love in word, neither in tongue;
but in deed and in truth."
Be CONSISTENT. THIS IS THE KEY!!!
We all reap what we sow. Sow the seeds of love and you will reap them.
2Tim 3:16 "All scripture is given by inspiration of God, and is profitable
for doctrine, for reproof, for correction, for instruction in
righteousness:"
Ask the Lord to help you to be the best godly parent that you can be. The
Lord can enable you to teach your children His ways. He will lead them into
His paths.
Copyright © 2003 Cobblestone Road Ministries
All Rights Reserved
